Silmunny’s Wedding

Silmunny is the warden of U.C. College’s West Hostel. She is 26 years old and is the youngest of eight children. She is not from a wealthy family, but she is trying to make her way. And despite that fact that she is not fluent in English, Silmunny was my very first friend here in India.

Although it took some rearranging of plans, I wouldn’t have missed her marriage to Joby for the world.

I spent the night in Silmunny’s room (which she had vacated) at the West Hostel and got up in the morning early enough for the girls to dress me in a sari, pick out my “ornaments,” do my hair, and put henna on my hands. We had a wonderful time getting ready, and then, after a quick breakfast, we were off to Perambuvoor.

We had to take three different buses, and it was almost three hours of standing (and holding on for dear life) on these buses before we reached the little country chapel where Silmunny and Joby would say their vows. By the time we got there, however, the vows had already been said. In fact, the ceremony was virtually over. I was rolling my eyes and wondering why I’d even bothered to come when Silmunny spotted me. She smiled such a sweet smile, and I could not help but smile back. I was hot, sweaty, and tired, but I was glad to be there.

Following the ceremony (yes, the one we missed), we got in a van to go to the reception, which was held outside of Joby’s parents’ house. We had a lovely meal of fried rice and chicken, then quickly vacated our seats so the next shift could sit down to eat.

While they were eating, we went into the house to pay our respects to the newlyweds. Silmunny was sitting in a bedroom, and her girls (about 20 of them) rushed in with hugs, kisses, and tears. After sitting with her for a while, we decided it was time to go. But none of us were leaving that house without hugging her one more time. So we made a little line and went through, one-by-one, offering our congratulations and best wishes to our good friend and receiving from her a kiss on the cheek and a falling tear.

When it was my turn, I was still incredibly hot and sweaty. And I was still tired and not looking forward to our three-hour journey home. I have to say, I’ve been in much better moods. But seeing Silmunny’s eyes sparkle lifted my spirits right away. She grabbed my hands, then she grabbed my face, and then she just grabbed my whole body. And, crying for joy, she hugged me for a long, long time. Finally, she let go and we said goodbye and stay in touch.

As we waited for our first bus, one of the girls from the hostel said, “Silmunny was so glad you could come.” I smiled and replied, “So was I.” And I really, really was, although, at the same time, I was thinking, “Now get me home and out of this sari!!!”