A New Month, a New Room, and a New Perspective

As the last few moments of September approached, I found myself in disbelief that I have been in India for an entire month. It really doesn’t seem possible that this much time has passed since I stepped off of the plane and onto foreign ground. Much has happened in the past month: I’ve started to wear Indian dress, I’ve gotten good at eating with my hands, and I’ve even learned a few words in Malayalam. I’ve also begun my work at Union Christian College, made friends at Chacko Homes, and seen some of the glorious sites of Kerala. Still, the adjustment period continues…

You know, a month is quite a long time if you are on vacation. But the fact of the matter is that this is no vacation, and I have only just begun to let that simple fact sink in. I have not taken a vacation in India; no, I have moved to India. And to become adjusted to a new home and a new culture in which to live, a month is hardly any time at all. I like to think of it in comparison to my family’s move to DeKalb in the summer of 2003. Nearly an entire year went by before I was even able to say the words: “I’m from DeKalb;” before that, it just wasn’t “home.” This was when I moved a mere 60 miles from my previous home. But this time, I’ve come thousands of miles, to a culture that is very different from the one I have known for 22 years. And I have to accept that it isn’t going to be “home” still for quite some time.

And yet, I continue to make progress. I have certainly become more comfortable at Chacko Homes, the retirement community where I have an apartment. On October 1, I moved from a very large apartment on the second floor to a much smaller one on the first floor. Although I was only moving down the stairs, I was a bit worried that, just when I thought I might be getting settled, I had to start the process over in yet another place. But it wasn’t that way at all. Although my new room is about a quarter of the size of my previous one, I am much more comfortable there. It is cozier. It is cooler. And, at night, it is darker. (This is a huge help to me, as I am having trouble sleeping through the night.) The only problem with the new room is my pillow – if one can even call it a pillow. It’s about as soft as a stack of newspapers. But this is easy enough to fix, at least I hope.

So, to begin this new month, I have a new room. And along with this new room, I am trying to grasp onto new comforts, new little pleasures, and an entirely new perspective of my life here. See, now that the experiences aren’t so new to me, I find myself forming opinions more quickly and easily. This opens the door to frustrations and even anger, which are not necessarily directed at any one person or thing, but simply at India. I know this is a part of the process of adjustment and assimilation, and I am willing to go through it. But I also know that I cannot let the little annoyances of each day get to me; if I do, I will never make it here another 11 months. And I want, more than anything, to feel like this is “home,” not to wish to go home.

So, I wait. I practice patience, and I practice understanding. I practice brushing off the little things that go wrong and holding fast to the little things that go right. Each day brings with it new challenges, but also new opportunities. And I remind myself again and again that this is exactly why I am here – to be challenged, and, through those challenges, to find opportunities to grow. After one month, it is sinking in that I am not on a trip and that my time here is not always (or even often) going to be fun. It’s not a year-long vacation. It’s a year-long struggle. But it is a struggle that I have dreamt about for a very long time.

Before I know it, this month will have come and gone, and then another and another until it is sometime next August and I am boarding a plane that will take me back home. Like that plane, time is flying, and I am not prepared to let this year pass me by while I wish that things were easier. So I will struggle, and I will do it happily. This is a new month. To celebrate, I’ve moved into a new room, and I’ve gained a new perspective.